Be not afraid

I’ve been thinking a lot about fear lately. I came to realise that I have spent most of my life being afraid of one thing or another. You probably know the drill: afraid of getting it wrong, of getting into trouble, of someone not liking me, or criticising me. I’ve been afraid of not having enough money, of not dressing well, of failure, of success ….  unfortunately the list goes on.

 

But what I have come to realise is that there is nothing to be afraid of. Yes, tough things have happened, some people haven’t liked me, I have got into trouble (in both the old-fashioned sense and the literal), I have got things wrong and you know what? I’m still here, the sun continues to rise in the morning, I am still loved and above all – I am safe.

 

Because that’s where it all comes from, of course. All those fears are about not being safe in the world, as though what happens out there has anything to do with who I am – the real me, not the good girl who has tried so hard all her life. To feel unsafe is a killer – sometimes literally, but it certainly kills our soul. When we believe that who we are is defined at someone else’s whim, then that sets us up for some very rocky ground.

 

But at last, at my grand old age, I have come to see this for the great lie that it is.  I am never not in charge of my own thoughts and feelings, and short of a knife-wielding homicidal maniac, no-one can truly hurt me without my say-so.

 

The irony is that I have always regarded myself in many ways as courageous, and I have been preaching the gospel of living without fear for a long time now, first as a psychotherapist and now as a spiritual teacher, but it’s only been in these last few days that I have really seen the truth and welcomed it into my whole being.

 

There is nothing to be afraid of.

 

Nothing.

 

Nothing can hurt me unless I allow it, and now I choose to not allow it. I know that this metamorphosis has come about through my developing spiritual journey, as I have learned to take total responsibility for everything that happens to me and to grow in my trust in a generous, loving Universe. If you think that that just demonstrates my gullibility and new age wankerdom, so what? I know my own truth. For the first time in my life, I can honestly say, ”I am not afraid.” What about you?